Let's get physical...and other random thoughts

[porter_inc]

I love exercising. Yes, the health benefits are great, and the high I get from it is something I definitely miss when I don't get in my workout. But, and this is hard for me to admit, I also like the way it makes me look. I know Orlando appreciates it, too, so now I work out for him as much as I do for myself. I'm in very good shape and I can admit that I look pretty good. Nothing's sagging, nothing's bulging unless it's supposed to, and I'm not ashamed to take off my clothes shirt in public. While I'm blushing a little while I type this, the fact remains that I believe it's time I embrace my assets and stop being self-depracating if I receive a compliment. All right, I'm lying. I'm still going to blush if someone compliments me. Damn it. The reason I think it's so hard for me to be vain is because I wasn't raised to feel good about myself in any way. Anything I thought I did well was immediately put down by my father and I was told pride was sinful. That's another story, though.

I was a complete geek growing up. I had braces, I was ugly, I was picked on, I never stood up for myself and I couldn't fight a lick. (I still can't fight and I was hesitant to learn for a very long time. Once, I tried to take a boxing class, but I had to quit the first night because I had a panic attack. Getting my ass kicked by my dad on a regular basis has made me shy away from anything resembling violence. But, now that I feel a genuine need to be able to protect the man I love, I'm thinking about taking a class again. I'm strong, but I don't know how to use that strength.)

In high school, I scored extremely well on assessment tests but never applied myself in class for fear of being labeled "the smart kid." I didn't want to stand out, I never wanted to be recognized for my accomplishments, and I certainly never wanted to let on that I was a lot cleverer than people thought. I got over that in college, by the way, but I still liked to be modest and keep a low profile. You see, if people underestimate you while they think they're stepping all over you, they tend to become comfortable and complacent and are shocked when you fight back. I haven't come right out and said this before, and I won't say it again, but remember the following: I'm friendly, I smile a lot, I talk a lot and I sometimes play dumb. But I'm not an idiot. If I genuinely like you, you'll know it. It'll usually involve me talking to you on a regular basis and having fun with you while I do it. I'm loyal to my friends until the day they give me a reason to no longer trust them. After that happens, I'm still friendly, but guarded. Lastly, and please excuse the language, if you ever fuck with the people I care about, most especially the man I love, I will find a way to make sure you pay for it. I can admit that it takes a lot to make me truly angry, but once I am, you won't find anything remotely amusing about it.

No, I haven't taken cranky pills today, I'm just putting out a fair warning that I'm no longer a doormat. (If you're reading this, K, and you probably are, I'm not scared of you anymore.) Trust me, this goes to issues I've had since way back. I've also decided that I'm going to retool my friends list for simplicity's sake. If I have you friended, but you haven't friended me back, I'm going to remove you and make all my entries friends only. (Plus, I don't read anyone's journal if they don't have me friended, so, really, what's the point?) Reading my journal without friending me is a bit like spying on me and I don't appreciate that. I'm very hinky about privacy matters now and I'd appreciate anything I have to say in here not being shared with outsiders. I know I can trust my friends and, frankly, as I've just explained, I don't need validation from strangers to make me feel special. If I do get wind of anything private being shared, I'll unfriend you, too. This will be my last public post.

That's all.


ooc: Despite what he says, the boy is a bit cranky because of 'press' stuff. *sigh* Just check the friends list on his user info page and comment to be added if you're not on it. :-D

Comments

[shaman-x.livejournal.com]

Tai Chi Chuan is good. Also, I think that should have 's in it somewhere. Or Aikido.

There's also Krav Maga which is excellent for an offence-based defence and it basically teaches you fighting in worst-case scenarios as opposed to the more formalised martial arts -- although Krav Maga really is violent, so probably not for you.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

I've seen news stories about Krav Maga and it looks very effective, but I might have to work my way up to that. I do like the sound of martial arts, though.

[shaman-x.livejournal.com]

See, the problem with working your way up is that, quite a lot of the time, you end up having to unlearn things, because disciplines clash.

I say, as if I ever learned anything formally. Um. Heh.

In my experience? You go for the groin, which they'll be expecting and block, and you use that opening to smash them in the nose. That's always a good one. And never underestimate the kick to the shins. Both of which should, obviously, be followed by you running away as hard as you can.

Running away is a seriously underrated art. Just don't go up unless you know how you're getting back down.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Maybe I should just suck it up and go for the most effective thing, then.

And that really is sound advice. Seriously, I don't know how to defend myself and it's pretty pathetic if you think about it. I'm going to add what you've told me to whatever else I learn.

I really appreciate you weighing in on this one, Mike.

[lt-wes-janson.livejournal.com]

If you ever feel the need to learn a bit of hand to hand and you want it to be with someone your comfortable with, just let me know. I'm considered to be rather good at that sort of thing where I come from.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

I just might take you up on that. It would be so much better than learning from a stranger.

[lt-wes-janson.livejournal.com]

Yeah, although you should be aware that I'm not all about technique and effective, pretty moves. I have a bit more of the whatever works street fighter mentality.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

I think street fighter sounds pretty damn good. I need to make it my instinct to fight back when someone comes after me rather than just take whatever they dish out.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_call_me_snake_/]

Don't think this sounds cranky at all. Just someone getting their priorities together.

I'd offer to help you with anything but I know if you wanted my help you'd ask me.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

I knew you'd understand.

I was wondering if you'd give me a crash course in firearms sometime. My ex took me to the range with his 9mm a few times, but it wasn't enough for me to feel really comfortable.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_call_me_snake_/]

No problem. I set up a firing range at the house though I'd love to see the press follow us to a gun store.

[lost-spiritus.livejournal.com]

I know I'm a girl and all but I know some stuff about fighting and defending. I don't want to do it for you, but I could show you some moves.

*bites her lip, worry etched on her face*

You ok?

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

I'd love for you to show me some stuff, Mac, thanks!

I'm okay. I just woke up this morning with the need to circle the wagons for some reason.

[lost-spiritus.livejournal.com]

Sure, when you're all settled in, I'll come show you.

Too much shit huh?

[orlandomuse.livejournal.com]

You are fucking gorgeous.

(And so is your new LJ layout!!)

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Thanks, baby. *smiles* So are you. It's so cold, I think we should skip our workout today and stay in bed all day.

(Thanks! I had to get you in there!)

[orlandomuse.livejournal.com]

I think that's a fabulous idea.

[aimlessbeck.livejournal.com]

And it goes without saying that, if someone were to actually fuck with either you or Orlando, I'd be more than ready and willing to hunt and hurt some people down.

In other words, you have someone else here who's willing to help you out should you need it.

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Michael. It eases my mind to know you're there. I just want to keep Orli safe.

[aimlessbeck.livejournal.com]

He will be. You both will be.

[andre-korda.livejournal.com]

*reads post then sends email to Will*

Monsieur Porter,

Frankly I do not know what has happened nor do I wish to intrude on your privacy. However, if you require assistance with some thing or some one, let me know. I would be happy to assist. And you know, I have some experience with martial arts. But if that is not sufficient enough there is always Shan.

Sincerely,
A. Korda

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

*sends return email*

Thank you so much. I may be overreacting, but it's better to err on the side of caution rather than be an easy target.

Please thank Shan, as well.

Will

[logan-maxwell.livejournal.com]

Is everything alright, or did something happen?

Anything I can do to help or give assistance with, don't hesitate to let me know.

And, if anyone is messing with you...

[ex-will-port106.livejournal.com]

Technically, nothing's happened, but I'm feeling a little off balance.

I will definitely let you know when I need help, though. I just hope it won't come to that.

[logan-maxwell.livejournal.com]

*frowning* What's made you feel that way?

I hope not either, but if you need anything, don't hesitate to call. I'd rather be called and find out it was nothing, than the other way!